: Tiger Holiday Poem
Ho ho ho!
>Twas the night of Thanksgiving
>and out of the house
>Tiger Woods came a flyin',
>chased by his spouse.
>She wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,
>Cause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.
>He’d been cheatin' on Elin,
>and the story progressed.
>Woman after woman
>stepped up and confessed.
>He’d been cheatin’ with
>Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,
>With Joselyn, and Kalika.
>The world had the story.
>From the top of the Tour
>to the basement of blues,
>Tiger’s sad sordid tale was all
>over the news.
>With hostesses,waitresses, he had lots of sex,
>When not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts.
>Despite all his cryin’ and
>beggin' and pleadin',
>Tiger’s wife went investin' --
>a new home in Sweden.
>And I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,
>"If you’re gettin' laid then I’m gettin' paid."
>She’s not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer,
>Her prenup made Christmas come early this year!!